November has been a funny month. It’s been full of ups and downs – lots of preparing to go into hospital for Jessica’s surgery; the disappointment of being cancelled and then having to go through the whole process again. We’ve had two dates for surgery this month: 8th November and 21st November. The first one was cancelled the day before it was due to take place; the second on the morning the surgery was due to happen. Both times were for very valid and unavoidable reasons. It’s still been a bit of a rollercoaster on the emotional front though!
Jessica has found it quite hard to have the surgery cancelled although has readjusted to being back to normal routines and starting the countdown to surgery once again. The new surgery date is 28th December. At least we know we can enjoy the festive season and have Christmas together before stepping back on the hospital rollercoaster.
The last few months have been very much about making the most of family time. Having the cloud of surgery hanging over us all has made us so much more aware of how precious that time is. There’s been a new appreciation for the ordinary, everyday moments. I’m finding myself stepping back from the busyness that often comes with this time of year; consciously slowing down in order to savour the little moments. Watching my girls more closely when they play together. Trying to take in all the little details that I might otherwise miss; trying to capture the moment in my heart and hold it there forever.
Having a date for a major surgery is like having a big barrier blocking my view of the weeks ahead. I can see as far as the date for the surgery and no further. Everything beyond it is unknown and potentially quite scary. My world shrinks to a few weeks. A few weeks which we will enjoy as much as we can. Our diary is looking quite empty for December and we won’t be trying to fill it as much as we usually do. As much as I love all the hustle and bustle of the festive season; it also brings with it the extra stress of trying to juggle all the different balls. This year, there will be the fun moments, the exciting adventures but they will be balanced with quiet days and time to relax.
This month’s Me and Mine photos sum up the last month quite well. They show the fun moments, the ordinary moments and the focus on preparing for hospital and surgery. An afternoon at Langley Park making the most of family time together; snuggles at bedtime after reading a story and the four of us together on the evening before Jessica’s surgery was due to take place.
The hospital rollercoaster is still to come. But for now, we will focus on the festive season and time together as a family.