Child loss

The wooden carving of Jessica at her forever bed with yellow roses and goldenrod in a wooden vase behind her

Grief and life without Jessica: learning to live with grief

Grief has become part of my life now. It’s a constant presence in our everyday lives. Sometimes grief sits quietly in the background and we are almost able to forget…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

National Grief Awareness Week – #shareyourstory

This week (2nd – 8th December) is National Grief Awareness Week – a week which aims to normalise grief and get people talking about it. Many people feel uncomfortable around…

Hubby, Thomas and Sophie eating birthday cake at Jessica's forever bed

Remembering Jessica: a special birthday picnic

Last Sunday was Jessica’s ninth birthday – the third birthday that we have had to mark without her. Special days, anniversaries and milestones are always very emotional days, but we…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

To Jessica on her 9th birthday

Darling Jessica, Today is your ninth birthday. Nine years old. How grown-up that sounds. I wonder what you would be like at nine years old. What kind of things would…

Sophie and Jessica looking down at the mirror pool at Upton House

Grief and end-of-summer sadness

The evenings are drawing in and summer is drawing to a close. As the days get shorter, the end-of-summer sadness descends. Autumn is nearly upon us. I know a lot…

Jessica wearing a fairy costume in the woods, facing away from the camera

Grief and life after Jessica: as if she never existed

One of the hardest things about living life without Jessica, is the merciless passing of time that takes us further and further away from our life with Jessica. Early on…

Sophie and Jessica walking in front of me, hand-in-hand with Sophie a little ahead of Jessica

Grief and life after Jessica: Overtaking

Today Sophie is 6 years, 7 months and 8 days old. The exact age that Jessica was on the day she died. Today Sophie is the same age that Jessica…

A smiley Jessica on a fairground ride

Grief and life after Jessica: two years on

Darling Jessica Two years. How can it be two whole years since we last gave you a snuggle; since we last looked into your beautiful blue eyes and heard your…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

#givejoyforjessica – spread a smile on 14 April 2020

Next Tuesday is the second anniversary of Jessica’s death. Last year, we marked the anniversary by doing things to bring joy to others and encouraging other people to join in…

Jessica and Sophie sitting on a bench at Blackgang Chine with giant garden gnomes on either side of them

Grief and life after Jessica – the last of the shared experiences

This half-term is proving to be quite an emotional one. As I dropped Sophie back at school on the first day after the half-term break, I couldn’t help but remember…