Child loss

Hubby, Thomas and Sophie eating birthday cake at Jessica's forever bed

Remembering Jessica: a special birthday picnic

Last Sunday was Jessica’s ninth birthday – the third birthday that we have had to mark without her. Special days, anniversaries and milestones are always very emotional days, but we…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

To Jessica on her 9th birthday

Darling Jessica, Today is your ninth birthday. Nine years old. How grown-up that sounds. I wonder what you would be like at nine years old. What kind of things would…

Sophie and Jessica looking down at the mirror pool at Upton House

Grief and end-of-summer sadness

The evenings are drawing in and summer is drawing to a close. As the days get shorter, the end-of-summer sadness descends. Autumn is nearly upon us. I know a lot…

Jessica wearing a fairy costume in the woods, facing away from the camera

Grief and life after Jessica: as if she never existed

One of the hardest things about living life without Jessica, is the merciless passing of time that takes us further and further away from our life with Jessica. Early on…

Sophie and Jessica walking in front of me, hand-in-hand with Sophie a little ahead of Jessica

Grief and life after Jessica: Overtaking

Today Sophie is 6 years, 7 months and 8 days old. The exact age that Jessica was on the day she died. Today Sophie is the same age that Jessica…

A smiley Jessica on a fairground ride

Grief and life after Jessica: two years on

Darling Jessica Two years. How can it be two whole years since we last gave you a snuggle; since we last looked into your beautiful blue eyes and heard your…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

#givejoyforjessica – spread a smile on 14 April 2020

Next Tuesday is the second anniversary of Jessica’s death. Last year, we marked the anniversary by doing things to bring joy to others and encouraging other people to join in…

Jessica and Sophie sitting on a bench at Blackgang Chine with giant garden gnomes on either side of them

Grief and life after Jessica – the last of the shared experiences

This half-term is proving to be quite an emotional one. As I dropped Sophie back at school on the first day after the half-term break, I couldn’t help but remember…

Jessica on a rocking black swan

Grief and life after Jessica: Secondary losses

Living life without Jessica is the hardest thing I have ever done. Some mornings I wake up, and wonder how on earth I can endure the day ahead. Some days…

A smiley Jessica sitting in a tree

Grief and life after Jessica: 18 months on

18 months. 18 months of having to live without our beautiful big girl. Part of me wonders how it can it be 18 months already, but then sometimes I look…