Child loss

A smiley Jessica on a fairground ride

Grief and life after Jessica: two years on

Darling Jessica Two years. How can it be two whole years since we last gave you a snuggle; since we last looked into your beautiful blue eyes and heard your…

A very smiley Jessica on the rocking horse at the park

#givejoyforjessica – spread a smile on 14 April 2020

Next Tuesday is the second anniversary of Jessica’s death. Last year, we marked the anniversary by doing things to bring joy to others and encouraging other people to join in…

Jessica and Sophie sitting on a bench at Blackgang Chine with giant garden gnomes on either side of them

Grief and life after Jessica – the last of the shared experiences

This half-term is proving to be quite an emotional one. As I dropped Sophie back at school on the first day after the half-term break, I couldn’t help but remember…

Jessica on a rocking black swan

Grief and life after Jessica: Secondary losses

Living life without Jessica is the hardest thing I have ever done. Some mornings I wake up, and wonder how on earth I can endure the day ahead. Some days…

A smiley Jessica sitting in a tree

Grief and life after Jessica: 18 months on

18 months. 18 months of having to live without our beautiful big girl. Part of me wonders how it can it be 18 months already, but then sometimes I look…

A birthday cake in the shape of a butterfly with pink buttercream wings covered in butterfly and heart sprinkles and a number 8 candle

To Jessica on your eighth birthday

Darling Jessica,   Today is your eighth birthday. Eight sounds so grown up. I wonder what you would have been like now. I could imagine you on your seventh birthday…

A drawing of me looking sad, holding a happy mask in front of my face and looking into a mirror

Grief and life after Jessica: Behind the mask

I had a conversation with an acquaintance the other day which went something like this:   Them: “You look miserable today, what’s the matter?” Me: “Jessica’s dead.” Them: “Oh, is…

A pink and white heart with "Jessica" written on it hanging in a tree

Grief and life after Jessica: How do you survive this?

“How do I survive this?!” It’s a question I’ve screamed out many times over the past year. In those moments when I am blinded by tears, overwhelmed and broken by…

Jessica and Sophie sitting and splashing in a tuff tray full of water

#givejoyforjessica – spread a smile on 14 April

The one phrase I probably use most often to describe Jessica is ‘joy-carrier’. She truly was a little ray of sunshine – full of big smiles and spreading happiness wherever…

Jessica's memorial at GreenAcres, next to a wooden vase filled with daffodils

A tribute to our joy-carrier: the making of Jessica’s memorial

Jessica’s forever bed is in a beautiful woodland burial site. As the surroundings are all very natural, there are quite strict restrictions about memorials and what can be placed at…