The end of the summer term is a time of transition. Sophie’s time at infant school is drawing to a close. This time next week will be her last day there. I’m feeling quite emotional about my baby girl moving on from this step; acutely aware of all the little last moments of her infant school life and how quickly Sophie is growing up. That awareness of time slipping through my fingers; wanting to hold on to these moments before they end; wishing that we could slow down time.
Sophie’s junior school transition has been mostly online due to Covid restrictions but she’s met her new teacher virtually and we’ve also had a video meeting to meet the teachers too. Her new school isn’t completely unfamiliar thanks to having attended school fayres and discos there and thankfully Sophie’s teacher for Year 3 is a familiar face too as she was Jessica’s reception teacher.
As you can imagine, this transition is quite an emotional one, particularly for us as parents. It’s a transition that Jessica never got to make, a milestone that she won’t get to share with Sophie. Another reminder of how Sophie has moved beyond where Jessica was; that my middle child is now the one that leads the way instead of following in her big sister’s footsteps. And as thankful as I am to get to experience these milestones with Sophie, it also comes with a hefty dose of heartbreak for all that I have missed out on with Jessica and will continue to miss out on. But at least Sophie’s new teacher knows us and was a significant person in Jessica’s life too and even though Jessica never got to attend the school that Sophie is about to start at, the teachers there know about her which makes this transition a little easier.
Another recent transition that has made me a little emotional is Thomas stopping breastfeeding. It’s been a gradual transition (unlike with Sophie) with him asking for “mawk” less and less frequently. For the last month, I’ve been acutely aware that each feed may well be the last and tried to cherish those moments. It’s been over a week now since he last asked for a feed and I’m beginning to accept that this particular era is now over. While I’ve been prepared for it, I’m still a little sad especially as he’s my last baby. I’ve spent six and a half years of my life breastfeeding my children and now that time has come to an end. On the plus side, it means there are several outfits in my wardrobe that I can now wear again!
We’re also on the cusp of another big transition with the last step out of lockdown planned for 19 July. I’m feeling very mixed about it all to be honest. A big part of me is looking forward to normality – particularly with being able to sing and socialise at church again – but I’m also quite anxious about there no longer being any requirement for masks or social distancing. I’m quite conscious that although for many it feels like freedom day, there are a lot of people who will be feeling very vulnerable as a result and are very concerned about how much Covid cases will rise as a result and the impact of this. I think we’ll be doing our best to avoid crowded places and will continue to wear face coverings if we do need to be in them. I hope there won’t be a massive rise in cases and a need to lockdown again over winter as a result but I’m not feeling particularly optimistic on that front.
What I’ve been grateful for this week:
- Day 183 – I am grateful that, despite my mostly unsuccessful attempts so far to grow a cut flower patch in the garden this year, I have managed to grow enough for Jessica’s vase, and that there are enough roses blooming to share some with her otherwise.
- Day 184 – I am grateful that Sophie had such a fun time at her friend’s trampoline party (and for the 4-0 England win this evening!)
- Day 185 – I am grateful for a lovely afternoon making new friends and enjoying a barbecue in the garden.
- Day 186 – I am grateful that the event shelter is now up in the garden so I can sit in the shade and watch Thomas while he plays outside.
- Day 187 – I am grateful for little luxuries.
- Day 188 – I am grateful that England are in the final!
- Day 189 – I am grateful that Sophie’s new teacher in junior school is the same lovely teacher who taught Jessica in reception. It will make the transition to a new school so much easier knowing that her teacher is someone who knows Sophie and our family already, knew and cared about Jessica, and is aware of all the emotions that will be there at the start of this next step, especially with what would have been Jessica’s 10th birthday falling at the start of the school year too.
Other things that have made me smile this week:
- Sophie reading ‘There’s No Deer Around Here’ to Thomas. We were sent a copy for a review and there’s a giveaway up on the blog at the moment if you’d like to be in with a chance of winning your own copy of it.
- Meeting up with friends for a coffee while Sophie was at her dance classes.