I generally like mornings. Unless I’ve been disturbed multiple times through the night and wake up super-grumpy, this is the time of day when I’ve generally got the best reserves of energy and patience. Since the start of the year, we’ve been trying to have a few minutes of ‘snuggle time’ first thing in the morning, where we sit cuddled up together and read the poem for the day from ‘I Am The Seed That Grew The Tree’. Admittedly, Thomas mostly climbs all over us but for a few short moments, the gap between the mummy I want to be and the mummy I am disappears.
Sophie makes me smile every morning at drop-off time. There’s always a least a couple of big hugs and kisses at the school gate, followed by her stopping every few steps on her way to the classroom to wave, blow me another kiss and sign ‘I love you’. I love that she is still so very affectionate at this time of day. Now that she is at junior school, I’m becoming more aware of just how precious moments like this are. I know that there will be a time in the not-so-distant future when she won’t want to do this anymore. When I will transition from the mummy that she adores into a somewhat embarrassing parent. And so, I will hold these moments fast and enjoy them as much as I can.
With Thomas too, there is an awareness of time that is precious. In six months’ time, he will be at school and that one-to-one time together during the day will come to an end. And while I admit there are many moments when my little boy wears me out his energy and his mischief, I know too that there is a part of me that will miss these days when they are over.
There have been many times in the last ten years of motherhood when I’ve wished I could just bottle the moments. Many times when I wish I could step into photos and relive past memories. But time keeps moving on, and our children grow and change and as they do, we move into another new phase of family life. Each age bringing its own share of wonderful moments and challenging ones. And as much as I wish I could press pause sometimes and hold these moments fast, time continues to move on relentlessly pulling us all forward. All we can do is enjoy the happy moments as much as we can and remind ourselves that that “this, too, will pass” in the challenging ones.