Me and You: Why quality time as a couple is so important

After the busyness of the last couple of months and the feeling of being like passing ships, November has been all about spending time together as a couple, reminiscing and remembering the little things we love about each other. November is a good month for reminiscing as Armistice Day was the anniversary of our engagement seven years ago. We had been spending a few days in France and Belgium visiting the WW1 cemeteries and memorial sites and had attended the ceremony at Thiepval earlier that day. Hubby’s proposal over dinner in the hotel was a wonderful ending to what had been a very moving and emotional day.

It has become a tradition over the last couple of years for me and hubby to have a spa day together in November thanks to my mother-in-law’s delightful habit of giving spa vouchers for my birthday. My birthday is in May but we have tended to wait until hubby’s busy period at work is over before we use them. Having a day to ourselves, with time to relax and just enjoy being in each other’s company is utter bliss.

For a few hours, we focus completely on being together without any distractions from phones or the online world or small children. We reconnect with each other as a couple; as the people we were before we became “Mummy” and “Daddy”. Being Mummy and Daddy is the most beautiful thing in the world, but remembering all the little things that made us “us” helps to keep us grounded. The little resentments and irritations that can all too easily arise from the challenges that parenthood brings melt away, and we are happier and better parents when we come home because of it.

This month also saw us taking part in a fundraising concert to raise money for Friends of PICU, a charity which helps support children in the paediatric intensive care unit where Jessica was cared for. We both love to perform and musical theatre in particular is a passion that we both share. To get up on stage and perform a duet with my hubby is always so much fun. This time we were singing “It Takes Two” from Into The Woods.

Without the fundraising concerts that we organise once or twice a year, neither of us would really get the opportunity to perform on stage. Hubby’s long hours make it impossible to commit to a regular rehearsal schedule with an outside group, but the beauty of organising the concerts ourselves is that rehearsals can take place at our house, after the girls have gone to bed. They tend to sleep quite well through all the noise and then we only have to worry about childcare on the day of the concert itself. This time, my mum came to stay and took care of Jessica and Sophie so we could both completely focus on taking part. It’s a very different kind of time together from the spa day earlier this month, but it is quality time nonetheless – reconnecting with each other through doing something that we both love and rarely get to do these days.