Friday Focus 02/02/2024 – Autism

We’ve been going through the autism assessment process with Thomas over recent months and this week we had the feedback meeting, which has confirmed that Thomas is autistic. It’s what we’ve suspected for a while, and on the whole it’s a relief to have it confirmed.


The word 'autism' in light blue bubble writing


I’m hoping that having the diagnosis will help with getting Thomas the support that he needs, particularly at school. He’s a bright little boy and he does love to learn, but school has certainly been a challenging experience for him so far. We’re in the process of applying for an EHCP which will hopefully also help with him getting the right support.


I’m grateful for the support that we’ve had so far. We’ve had moments in the past where it has felt like  Thomas has been labelled as ‘naughty’ which we knew wasn’t the case and was upsetting for him, as well as us. Sophie summed it up well when she told him one morning recently: “You’re not naughty, Thomas, you’re just misunderstood.” Things definitely feel like they’ve improved on that front though, thank goodness. We’re learning different ways of parenting that work better with Thomas and help make him feel happier and we’ll keep on doing our best to help make his world a happier place. Fingers crossed that having the diagnosis will help others to do the same! He’s a loving, sweet little boy who just happens to see the world a bit differently.


Thomas on a web swing at the park



What I’ve been grateful for this week:


Thomas's Boys' Brigade armband with a red rectangular 'Anchors' badge and a round '140 Challenge' badge; a stage with letters spelling 'Matilda' above the stage and alphabet blocks on stage; Thomas doing some nature art with sticks and leaves; Thomas playing with play dough; Thomas lying on the sofa cuddling his toy sheep; a wooden vase of daffodils next to the carved wooden memorial at Jessica's forever bed; a sunset sky - "#366daysofgratitude 2024 - Week 5"


  • Day 26 – I am grateful for Thomas getting his Boys’ Brigade armband with his first Anchors’ badges.


  • Day 27 – I am grateful that Sophie enjoyed seeing some of her friends performing in Matilda.


  • Day 28 – I am grateful for time outside doing some nature art.


  • Day 29 – I am grateful for some one-to-one time with Thomas watching him having fun making letters with play dough.


  • Day 30 – I am grateful that we now have a diagnosis of autism for Thomas. Hopefully it will help with getting better support in place for him.


  • Day 31 – I am grateful for being able to bring Jessica daffodils (and knowing that the deer won’t be eating her flowers as long as daffodil season lasts!)


  • Day 32 – I am grateful for a beautiful sunset sky.



Other things that have made me smile this week:

  • Listening to Sophie and Thomas giggling together as Sophie dressed Thomas up in various princess dresses.


Thomas wearing a yellow princess dress and green cape with Pudsey ears


  • Sophie helping out on the AV desk at church.


  • An after-school trip to the park.


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12 thoughts on “Friday Focus 02/02/2024 – Autism

  1. I can imagine that it must bring some relief to get Thomas’ Autism diagnosis. I am sure it has cleared up some of your concerns and also those of others who interact with him. I hope he gets to understand his situation too and later will be able to verbalise it and be confident in doing so.

  2. Louise,
    This isn’t the diagnosis that you might have wished for, but I can understand how “on the whole it’s a relief to have it confirmed ”.
    There is power in having a name for something. Hopefully you will now be able to secure the right package of support for Thomas.
    I’m sure the online community will be accompanying you on your continuing journey.
    No doubt it’s best to receive the diagnosis early in life — my cousin is undergoing the assessment in her 70s!

  3. I love the way Sophie put it. Something hopeful and uplifting about being told you are not naughty, just misunderstood. What a big sister. I hope that Thomas gets the help he needs to make the most of his time at school. Frustrating when you can see that he is clever.

  4. Must be a relief to have Thomas’ diagnosis confirmed, and hopefully you’ll get the EHCP through in a fair time to get the support he needs. I’ve been getting daffodils for the house. I didn’t realise deer liked eating flowers!

  5. That is great you have got a diagnosis for Thomas and I hope it helps in the future, especially at school! He seems such a sweet boy, I can’t imagine him being naughty at all.
    What lovely photos! x

  6. Getting a label is always bittersweet, at least you know and you can get the help but it’s also a lot to process. Sophie is such a sweet and understanding little girl.

  7. I’m glad you finally have a diagnosis for Thomas and hope that you get any and all the support you need for him especially when it comes to school, I know sometimes families struggle with lack of support. Good tip on the daffodils, I didn’t realise the deer don’t like then – when I take flowers to my dad’s grave I always wonder what has been eating them, so looks like it will daffys from now on.

  8. I can only imagine how stressful it has been for you. I can remember getting my dyslexia one and I was just told I was thick. Thanks goodness things have changed

  9. It is good that you now have a diagnosis for Thomas and it’s great how you are dealing with this news. Hopefully he will be able to get the support he needs.
    He looks like he had a wonderful time trying on dresses.

  10. I really hope Thomas’s diagnosis opens doors to more support. Navigating the EHCP process can be challenging but keep fighting for what he needs and deserves and I promise it will all be worth it. It sounds like you’ve had a positive week on the whole – long may it last!

  11. You have done well to get his assessment done so early, my friend has had to pay for her 13 year old to go private. Thankfully you both have your diagnosis’ now so hope you both get the support you need

  12. I hope the EHCP process is smooth for you and you can get support in place for Thomas at the start of his education journey. I didn’t realise deer didn’t like daffs, I’ve had a friend complain that flower heads often disappeared from a family members grave, I’ll pass this on to them next time it comes up.

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