Grief is a funny thing. There are times when I feel like I am drowning in the stormy sea of grief and times when the waves calm and I find myself just floating along. I have been told that with the passing of time, the frequency of the storms will reduce. That as I move… Read More
Some days you feel so far away. I look for signs that you are still here with me somehow and there are none. Just emptiness. I long for you to visit me in my dreams but night after night goes by and I do not see you there. I search for you all… Read More
So much of what I read about child bereavement focuses on grieving mothers. I read things like “there is no pain greater than that of a grieving mother” and while I understand why people write that, it also makes me cross. The pain of a grieving mother is often acknowledged but what about the dads?… Read More
Darling Sophie, Today is your last day at preschool. I can’t quite believe that eighteen months have passed since your very first day at preschool. It has been lovely to see how much you’ve enjoyed your time at preschool; to see you grow in confidence and to make new friends. Preschool has definitely… Read More
“How are you?” Such a natural question and so difficult to answer at times. I have my standard responses now. I’m ok. Surviving. Up and down. Taking it moment by moment. Getting through as best I can. Sometimes, all I can do in response to the question is just shrug. How am I?… Read More
The realisation that we are getting closer and closer to Peanut’s arrival has well and truly hit now. I still feel a very long way off being ready for Peanut’s arrival. I have at least started to prepare a little more for it now. The Moses basket has come down from the loft and we… Read More
One of the things that I find hard about having to cope with grieving for Jessica while being pregnant with Peanut is the lack of information and support for women in my situation. I have searched online so many times, trying to find another story like ours. Trying to find someone else who has walked… Read More