I’ve been a bit out-of-sorts this week. Just feeling tired, and some things have been getting to me more than they would do usually. One of those weeks where grief has been hitting hard again. I miss Jessica every day but some days feel much harder than others, and there are times when that ever-present ache of longing for her just feels so very hard to endure. I don’t think there’s been any specific trigger for it – it’s just the nature of grief to come and go like this. I’m just doing my best to be kind to myself right now, allow grief the time and space it needs and to not overload myself too much.
What I’ve been grateful for this week:
- Day 42 – I am grateful for a lovely morning with Thomas’s godmother coming along to Tots Go Wild with us, and for a good chat afterwards over lunch and a walk.
- Day 43 – I am grateful for family time getting out and about, although we gave up on the treasure trail we were following less than halfway through it! Was lovely to bump into The Mummy Stylist while out though (and thanks for sending over the photo too!)
- Day 44 – I am grateful for a visit from cousins and a lovely family meal together.
- Day 45 – I am grateful for blossom starting to appear on the trees.
- Day 46 – I am grateful for Sophie’s creativity and imagination when creating her own little worlds with Lego. There are always such lovely little details to look at each time she makes something.
- Day 47 – I am grateful for a quiet morning and time to myself just sitting with Jessica.
- Day 48 – I am grateful for a quiet evening and the opportunity to have an after-school trip to the park.
Other things that have made me smile this week:
- Spotting a photo of the book I wrote to help prepare Jessica for her heart surgery on the homepage of the new Little Heart’s Matter website. So glad that it is still helping other heart children.
- Rehearsing the seaside medley for the music hall show.
- Going for a walk around Herschel Park with Thomas.