Living life without Jessica is the hardest thing I have ever done. Some mornings I wake up, and wonder how on earth I can endure the day ahead. Some days are bearable; but on other days, the reminders of all the little things that we have lost come thick and fast. Losing Jessica is… Read More
18 months. 18 months of having to live without our beautiful big girl. Part of me wonders how it can it be 18 months already, but then sometimes I look back and it all feels so long ago. It’s such a horrible feeling – that life with Jessica can feel so distant at times. There… Read More
Darling Jessica, Today is your eighth birthday. Eight sounds so grown up. I wonder what you would have been like now. I could imagine you on your seventh birthday but I can’t quite imagine what you would be like if you were still here now. I know that you would be excited about your… Read More
Three years ago, we travelled from Land’s End to John O’Groats by bus and train to raise money for Little Hearts Matter. Four days on trains with Jessica and Sophie was quite an adventure and we enjoyed our travels. This summer we are repeating that journey but in reverse – travelling from John O’Groats to… Read More
It’s ten years today since I married my wonderful husband. It’s funny, it doesn’t seem possible that it can be ten years already and yet in many ways it feels like we’ve been married longer than that too. Our journey through married life has been quite different to how I imagined it might be. We’ve… Read More
I had a conversation with an acquaintance the other day which went something like this: Them: “You look miserable today, what’s the matter?” Me: “Jessica’s dead.” Them: “Oh, is that all?” Me: Them: Me: “Yes, that’s all.” That’s all. Just a trivial thing really. Living with the suffocating weight of grief. Enduring life… Read More
As expected, this week has been a stormy one on the grief front. With the memories of ‘this time last year’ becoming increasingly painful and the anniversary of Jessica’s death now just a couple of days away, my emotions have been very up and down. I knew this week would be a tough one. It’s… Read More
