This week has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I think I’ve gone through almost the whole range of emotions at various points this week, sometimes within the space of a few hours.
We’ve had the excitement of Nanny coming to stay for the weekend and the joy of seeing my family when we went to pick Nanny up. There’s been the fun of having a night out with my husband to go to a Beatles-themed fancy-dress party. We’ve had three trips to the dentist this week – one for a routine check-up for the children and two for me for some dental treatment that I was quite anxious about. Thankfully I found that listening to a guided meditation and an audiobook was a great way to help me relax once in the dentist’s chair.
Sophie performing in her Girls’ Brigade display made me proud – as did her school report which was excellent. Thomas’s school report was rather generic and told me next to nothing which was disappointing. We did get an SEN update though which was quite eye-opening and are now in the process of pursuing an autism assessment for him. I’ve got a lot of mixed feelings around things at school with Thomas at the moment. Reception year has been quite challenging in many ways.
I’ve been stressed and overwhelmed by my workload and trying to get things done before the school holidays. There’s been too much in my head this week which meant that one important thing – Thomas’s end of year concert – got forgotten about. He was so upset that Mummy wasn’t there and I felt awful for letting him down with no good reason to have done so. So that’s added a hefty dose of mummy-guilt into the mix.
There’s also been sadness this week as my uncle and one of my mum’s close friends both died over the weekend. The end of the school year and seeing Jessica’s classmates preparing to move up to secondary school comes with sadness too and the ever-present ache of missing Jessica. I did have a lovely surprise yesterday though when her classmates presented me with a beautiful card and a leaver’s hoody for Jessica. It meant so much that Jessica was remembered and to have her included in their leaver’s celebrations in this way.
So all in all, a very mixed week for me – there have been some lovely moments but quite a lot of not-so-lovely ones too!
What I’ve been grateful for this week:
- Day 188 – I am grateful for a lovely evening watching the Girls’ Brigade and Boys’ Brigade annual display.
- Day 189 – I am grateful for a fun evening at a Beatles-themed costume party.
- Day 190 – I am grateful for all the fun that Sophie and Thomas have had with Nanny this weekend.
- Day 191 – I am grateful for my lovely mum.
- Day 192 – I am grateful for giggles.
- Day 193 – I am grateful for beautiful flowers as a belated anniversary gift from my husband.
- Day 194 – I am grateful that Jessica is still remembered by her classmates who surprised me today with this lovely card and leaver’s hoody for Jessica. Means so much that she is still thought about.
Other things that have made me smile this week:
- Watching Nanny playing with Thomas at the park.
- Winning second place for my costume at the fancy-dress party.