Today is a milestone moment on our grief journey as Thomas reaches the exact age Sophie was when Jessica died. From now on, Sophie and Thomas will have had more time with each other than Sophie and Jessica had together. Like many of the other milestones that we’ve encountered since Jessica died, it’s one that I’ve been acutely aware of in the days leading up to it and struggled with. Jessica is always so very much missed and times like this bring home the realisation once more of all the moments she’s missed out on with her siblings.
I’ve learned over the last few years to give grief space at times like this. I’ve been trying to be gentle with myself this week and taking time out where I can. It’s been a fairly busy week, but there’s been a reasonable balance between being able to embrace the distraction of the busyness and being able to pull back and give myself space.
What I’ve been grateful for this week:
- Day 6 – I am grateful for freshly baked cheese scones.
- Day 7 – I am grateful for an afternoon spent out and about following a treasure trail with the children so that my husband could have space to do some DIY jobs at home.
- Day 8 – I am grateful that my Drowsy Chaperone character has encouraged me to learn a new instrument.
- Day 9 – I am grateful that Sophie has enjoyed getting back to dance lessons again today.
- Day 10 – I am grateful for a good check-up at the dentist for Sophie and Thomas.
- Day 11 – I am grateful for a plentiful supply of nice biscuits at this evening’s meeting.
- Day 12 – I am grateful for Sophie’s love of dance and the joy of seeing her grow and improve as a dancer.
Other things that have made me smile this week:
- Thomas singing the alphabet song whilst jumping on the letters on the alphabet caterpillar at the playground.
- Sophie and Thomas making each other giggle at bedtime.